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Confessions of a Washington Reject

I wrote this for Remnant Review in 1977. Multiply dollar figures by 4 to correct for price inflation.

From about the middle of June 1976, through January 3, 1977, I was serving my country on a full-time basis, meaning that I was deep into the Federal trough, but not paying Social Security taxes. When it is all said and done, not paying Social Security taxes for seven months was probably the single most important benefit I received for my stay in government service.

This should serve as an introduction to the nature of government service. I was an employee of the sovereign state of Congress. You think I'm joking. Not a bit. It is indeed a sovereign state. First of all, it employs its very own police force, and the force is probably the fourteenth or fifteenth largest police force in the United States. Second, Congress has wisely determined that laws passed by Congress to protect this nation's citizens do not apply to Capitol Hill. That, one must admit, is a sign of sovereignty. Equal Employment Opportunities Commission bureaucrats have no authority on Capitol Hill, so the secretaries are better looking, lower paid, and work harder than in other businesses. (The good-looking ones, by the way, are not the over-worked ones, if by work you mean typing.) Nobody has to hire minority group members, except for political reasons. There are no contracts. Congressmen hire and fire at will. Or at least they think they do. (We will cover that a little later.) There is a great pension plan, assuming anyone is so stupid as to believe that any pension is great in an era of inflation. But you do not have to belong to it. The boys at OSHA do not prowl around the halls of Congress, since they would be able to shut the place down if they were allowed to apply OSHA rules on safety. There are no Nader belts on the official cars of Congress, unless the Congressman wants them. You cannot subpoena a member of Congress for anything relating even remotely to his official duties. You must subpoena the House itself, at its discretion, and the House may or may not compel the Congressman to testify. In short, the rules and regulations that are strangling the citizens of the United States do not apply on Capitol Hill. They know what they are doing at least to this extent. The pollution of legislation from Congress is matched by the pollution from Congressional furnaces and Congressional vehicles; the Environmental Protection Agency has no jurisdiction here. The Post Office on Capitol Hill is run by Congress, not the U.S. Postal Service. Congress is the 51st state. Wait! Congress is the first state; Hawaii is the 51st.

OSHA certified Safety Signs for cheap.

The need for safety signs and warning decals has never been greater than it is today. New.Speedysigns.com is a great online resource for all of your custom signs, vinyl safety decals, safety signs and warning signs. By visiting the OSHA signs section of our site, the multitude of safety signs and warning signs we offer premade will be made available to you, or you have the option of creating your own custom sign that fits your specific needs.

Don’t forget that warning and safety signs are not always about business. Let’s first look at what can be done to have fun with  “warning signs”, “safety signs”, or “notice signs”. My daughter loves the sign on her door with the phrase “Princess in training.” on it. Recently I was in a coffee shop that had mostly female baristas, and there was a sign that read “Warning: The coffee is also hot”. By using the New.Speedysigns.com’s online design tool, you can put your own creativity into writing a humorous phrase under the official looking safety sign.

There are many uses for the safety sign that are quite serious. In almost every manufacturing, chemical, research facility, there are ways for people to get hurt or ill that requires you to warn them of the dangers. Signs advising the public on danger or property boundaries, are seen everywhere from National Parks to private property.

So, what is a safety sign? The ANSI (American National Standards Institute) definition of a safety sign is a visual alerting device which advises the observer of a potential hazard. The sign should be highly visible and clearly communicate the intended message. Safety signs usually consist of a signal word (i.e. Warning, Caution, Danger), a panel displaying the message, and/or a pictorial symbol that’s displayed to alert and inform observers to take precautionary or other appropriate action as a result of potential hazards.

Stickers, and decals can also be used for safety, and important uses. By using the safety icons in our clip-art library, you can build safety decals for just about any imaginable use. Most strong equipment and power tools today are required to have visible safety and warning stickers placed in the appropriate areas. These not only can help someone avoid potential harm, but can also help save you from an expensive lawsuit.

Another important aspect of creating safety signs in today’s world, is to make them bilingual. This is especially true if you are in an area that has a comparatively high concentration of people that English is not their primary language. If you own a business that requires warning and danger signs, and you have a number of Spanish speaking employees; even though the symbols are universal, it would be in your best interest to also include a bilingual message as well.

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